14 June 2000


The second "MEAT" war was brewing even when the very first supamarket was established in the 1950-1960's. With the new world at dawn, two dominant forces were already in competition. There was always a rivalry between them. When one became domesticated, the other followed suit. Yes. These were the wars between the cow and the chikin.

When the supamarkets were established, the deli's were the frontlines in the "cold war." Humans bought beef and chicken by the thousands and in fact, pork was also a major power since they were reknowned by the heart federation. Pork was becoming a threat and so with the manipulation of the pork company "DON," pork was choked into vacuum packages and advertised by a fat irishman.

The forces tuna and salmon were also suffering. Like, their land meat counterparts they were also sold in deli's, but the major shadow governments of cow and chikin were secretly sending stink bomb raids and also letting in the flies. Humans, the drones that they are were gullable enough to believe that tuna, salmon and other sea meats were unhygenic and so the sea meats were forced tin cans and in adverts for wagon wheels. To this day, they still echo "eat the wagon wheel, eat the wagon wheel."

Meanwhile, the cow forces and chikin forces were clashing. Chikin were dominating Christmas as a favourite alternative to their allies, turkey. Easter was also perfect propaganda machine. The theory was simple: easter EGGS leads to CHIKIN. In the eighties, MacDonald's introduced breakfast meals known as McMuffins, and you guessed it. IT HAD EGGS. The fore-product of chikin were bombing beefs corner.

Similarly, beef were bombing chikin meats with their "lean beef campaigns." Fueled by allegences with the company McCain's, Lean beef seemed to be the slim alternatives. With the egg battles, the cow unleashed their secret weapons the dairy products. Cheese and milk were advertised like never before. Campaign after campaign, "a rich source of calcium." The consumers were happy. Chikin were nervous. Cow were becoming triumphant. Chikin signed the armistice in Cow's victory after the KFC incident.

Today, peace talks are on the way as the television show "COW/CHICKEN" started on cartoon network. Cow representatives are concerned in why chicken is the older brother. Then again, chikin representatives said," So what? Chikin in the series is always victimised. Plus your cow can become a super hero!"

Also, another concern is the other cartoon "I am weasel." Are weasel and baboon meats ready to take on the titans of cow and chikin? I leave that thought up to you...